10 minutes soto zen. Noticed frustration looming from last nights class. I have deep frustration at not being able to find deeply experienced autonomous meditators (except on here in cyber space) Haven't found any in my street yet, or in the local coffee shop. * Judgement Alert * Some peopl ...
OpenMind
about 4 years ago 1 3
Trying zazen. Really lovely. Sure I'll still keep mix'n'matching but this felt just right today. Really didn't want to stop when the timer went off....
Bluemoon
about 4 years ago 2 2
Quite a shaky and emotional day - lots of mini-sits and giving myself a 'good talking to' got me through the morning. Mainly due to the subject matter of suicide. Hearing bereaved families telling their experiences brought back vivid memories of trying very inexpertly to support a friend after h ...
Bluemoon
about 4 years ago 2 2
• Heart of my heart/I am yours Having worked another very hectic 11 hour day, I was very tired again coming to this sit. For the first half of it simply remembering the verse, and keeping moving forward, was as much as I could manage. At one point I thought of the distracting thoughts as being l ...
jameswarlock
about 4 years ago 1
Waves of love continue at work; very emotional, constant thoughts of kirsten, have to hold myself back from crying several times, hopeless! Throughout entire sit spine was activated, energy coursing up and down; distinct feeling of expansion within the heart, bliss, spacelessness..
HamiTipene
about 4 years ago 1
I do self-enquiry as in my previous sits, but am completely overwhelmed by dullness. It's just one of those sits; I've just moved countries and of course it's tiring. So I make myself sit in gratitude and patience (though of course it's largely bloody-mindedness) and try to let go of the desire ...
Leems
about 4 years ago
Found a positive energy, guided meditation online. It was only 10 minutes, but I found that by the end I had achieved that incredible deep breathing that is so difficult to achieve. Hoping it carries me through the day...
HappyTara
HappyTara added a diary.
about 4 years ago 2 2
Head surprisingly calm and an unexpected feeling of emptiness appeared almost straight away. This kept being interrupted though by physical sensations (tightness of throat, pounding heart, clenching stomach). Seem to be holding all my tensions in my body at the moment. Belatedly realised that my ...
Bluemoon
about 4 years ago 3 4
• Heart of my heart/I am yours Tired and a bit grumbly tonight. I stayed pretty focussed on the practice, but particularly towards the end I started to feel frustrated - started having snatches of fantasy that I'm not getting anywhere, that I'm never getting anywhere, that I'm just stuck... then ...
jameswarlock
about 4 years ago 2 1
After a shaky day a most unspectacular sit in the park (no waves of emotion, no bubbles, only minor energy movement) but all the better for it. Loving kindness to myself and others. Lying in corpse focussing on the breath (always particularly enjoy this outside, seems to make resistance melt ...
Bluemoon
about 4 years ago 1
Meditated formally on zazen. Over the last twenty four hours noticed thoughts arising by themselves again but to a lesser degree than prior to the Zen class. Noticed that the gross winds weren't as settled in anymore and so thoughts were flowing in the winds. Practice off cushion, emptiness ...
OpenMind
about 4 years ago 4
Guided Meditation - Self-Realization Fellowship - Peace Never heard of this organization, and didn't look at the homepage until posting this, after doing the meditation. (Probably should have looked into it first, just googled "world peace meditation" and looked until I saw one that s ...
umyum
about 4 years ago 1
Waves of love coursing freely through me all day; reuniting with kirsten seems to have caused some major changes; perhaps a connection I did not dare think was real is now being allowed to express itself, perhaps a sinking into a deeper trust in life after the turn of events at the weekend.. Me ...
HamiTipene
about 4 years ago 6
What am I longing for? Is it in the headspace seeking silence? or the heart space seeking the beloved? I don't know the answer.
coyoteyogi
about 4 years ago 1 1
great sit. "the focus" . I was startled out of meditative state at end.
jsanders420
about 4 years ago
Short lunchtime sit. Had been feeling jittery and on edge this morning so needed
 to take this time. Didn’t have long enough to allow myself to delve into the
 emotions so sat open-eyed in a park and just focused on the breath. Calm
 restored (for a little while).
Bluemoon
about 4 years ago 2 2
Urge to get off cushion: massive. Urge to crawl out of skin and be anywhere but here, now: massive. Towards end frustrated so asked 'if this was the only moment. ..?'. Images of balloon directly infront of eyes floating away into the distance. Then another one. Sat taller.
Becky
about 4 years ago 4 1