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Morning sit. Missed it last night as fell asleep before the kids! Much better now. Stayed with a tension or feeling I have that I have to always be in motion and that I am being judged which really kicked in during the equine elective at vet school. It was a reality; anyone seen resting was labe ...
rosie
about 2 hours ago 1 1
This was almost like 2 different sits. I'd been to a writing workshop during the evening which looked at automatic writing, letting the words just spill out in response to a series of prompts based around gratitude, release, forgiveness, love and embodiment. I think I might have found it more us ...
Bluemoon
about 8 hours ago
Not long after I started dealing with anxiety I began some ocd like tendencies that began controlling my life. Constantly searching for the next "fix all" supplement and wasting my money on whatever drinks, food, fad or new habit that i thought would relieve me of how i was feeling. Wh ...
casper
about 19 hours ago 1
Really beautiful this morning, not actively sitting with anything but at the same time sitting with everything. It felt at a couple of points like my body was relaxing into life, letting go of something else but I don't know and don't need to know what. It feels strange to be typing words about ...
Bluemoon
about 23 hours ago 4 2
Had a 15 min sit at 4, because could not sleep. stayed with some feeling of tension that felt a bit like impatience. Then felt sleepy! Morning sit. 54 bows, keeping open and trusting myself, each bow a small letting go. Sat again with peace and joy. Near the end my mind wandered onto something ...
rosie
1 day ago 3 2
Morning sit. Sleepy which is unusual for a morning sit.
paulmac63
1 day ago 2
Started the sit with bowing and then all of a sudden decided to read over the wording of my tokudo (ordination) service. Some of it hit home harder today than it could at the time and there was a sense of it as a chain. My teacher and teachers before him made the same vows, probably with similar ...
Bluemoon
1 day ago 3 1
A very peaceful sit. Feeling joyful and sleepy... Guided metta meditation for the last ten minutes. That was lovely too!
rosie
1 day ago 3
Evening sit. Sat with a spider slowly crawling across the wall in front of me. Waited until the end, wished it well, caught it and put it outside. :)
paulmac63
1 day ago 3 1
It was very hard to not get lost in the streams of my thoughts.
SimplyEmil
1 day ago 4 1
Morning sit. Brought in some of the wording from the service I listened to last night into the start of this sit. Felt appropriate somehow.
Bluemoon
2 days ago 3
Morning zazen. Wasn’t too hard to get up and sit.
Jazzy
2 days ago 3 4
Major overload after some intense and painful and also beautiful sharing with the sangha group. Could not sit last night, had to collapse and sleep until now. Was unsure how to sit with this, so I began with lots of bows, soon broken by lots of painful sobbing with my head on the mat. Then I sat ...
rosie
2 days ago 3 3
Ever feel your tendrils rising, the hairs on
 your arms tingling?
 
 Lifting its wings the bird walked the edge of
 the branch, cawing, calling, 
 
 Head bent, 
 
 Where are you,
 
 Hairs on edge, 
 
 The hairs on the cat’s back rose, his tail
 ...
hugr5
2 days ago
I thought that last night might bring a tearful sit after yesterday's sangha group involved some brave sharing of difficult emotions and experiences. I didn't get to sit until much later and by then the moment for tears seemed to have passed. In the meantime while doing household tasks I'd liste ...
Bluemoon
2 days ago 3
10 minutes of lying samatha 20 minutes of lying samatha I was a little better than yesterday, but lots of things were still pushing me. Then I wrote to a friend and this brought some sadness to me. I have much more experience with anger and stress than with sadness. And this sadness was good. I ...
niroxki
2 days ago 2 1
Evening sit. I didn’t think i would last five minutes, tired and restless all day. The first fifteen were very good periods of quiet and concentration, deeply relaxing. Then then the fight for wakefulness began, not too bad though.
paulmac63
3 days ago 4
Since starting opens I've noticed that how therapeutic is it is to put my thoughts into words. I feel as if I'm making room in my mind to think about the things that are important to me. My mind feels less cloudy but what I still struggle with is the lag i have in social settings. Not long ago I ...
casper
3 days ago 2 2
A short sit at the start of a sangha group. Emotional and beautiful.
Bluemoon
3 days ago 3
Sitting with a sangha group. Triggered by coming close to a place associated with painful memories and feeling quite flooded with fear. Was doing my best self soothing and trying to find equilibrium. It did help quite a bit. Also did some metta practice. Was very glad to be there with everyone!
rosie
3 days ago 1
This felt beautiful. If my parents hadn't been expected any minute I'd have carried on sitting indefinitely. This morning bowing in front of the wisdom statue and compassion picture reminded me of my teacher and sangha, appreciating all the effort that it took to build up and still takes to sust ...
Bluemoon
3 days ago 3 2